Jimmy Carr Quotes: A Collection of the Funniest Jokes and One-Liners

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Jimmy Carr is a British comedian, actor, and writer who has been making people laugh since the early 2000s. He is known for his dark, often controversial, and often politically incorrect jokes. He has released several stand-up specials, written books, and hosted several television shows. Here is a collection of some of his funniest quotes and one-liners. If you're a fan of stand-up comedy, then you've probably heard of Jimmy Carr. Known for his quick wit and sharp tongue, he's one of the funniest comedians out there. And if you're looking for some laughs, then look no further than 'Jimmy Carr Quotes: A Collection of the Funniest Jokes and One-Liners.'This collection features some of Jimmy's best material, from his hilarious observations on everyday life to his razor-sharp insults aimed at celebrities and politicians alike. Whether you're in need of a good laugh or just want to impress your friends with some clever quips, this book has got you covered.But don't take our word for it – check out what other people are saying about 'Jimmy Carr Quotes'! Boona Muhammad calls it 'a must-read for anyone who loves comedy,' while J Edgar Hoover quotes says it's 'the perfect gift for any fan of stand-up.' So why wait? Grab your copy today and get ready to laugh until your sides hurt!

Quotes About Life

Jimmy Carr has a unique take on life and his quotes often reflect this. Here are some of his best quotes about life:



  • 'Life is like a box of chocolates. It's full of nuts.'
  • 'Life is too short to be taken seriously.'
  • 'Life is a series of disappointments, followed by death.'
  • 'Life is a game of chance. You never know what's going to happen next.'

Quotes About Love

Jimmy Carr also has some hilarious quotes about love. Here are some of his best:

  • 'Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably not a good idea.'
  • 'Love is like a roller coaster. It has its ups and downs, but it's always an adventure.'
  • 'Love is like a drug. It can make you feel great, but it can also make you do stupid things.'
  • 'Love is like a game of chess. You have to make the right moves or you'll end up in checkmate.'

Quotes About Money

Jimmy Carr also has some great quotes about money. Here are some of his best:

  • 'Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.'
  • 'Money can't buy love, but it can buy a plane ticket to visit the person you love.'
  • 'Money can't buy you class, but it can buy you a first-class seat on a plane.'
  • 'Money can't buy you friends, but it can buy you a better class of enemy.'

Quotes About Politics

Jimmy Carr also has some great quotes about politics. Here are some of his best:

  • 'Politics is like a game of chess. You have to make the right moves or you'll end up in checkmate.'
  • 'Politics is like a game of poker. You have to know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.'
  • 'Politics is like a game of Monopoly. You have to know when to buy, when to sell, and when to get out of jail free.'
  • 'Politics is like a game of snakes and ladders. You have to know when to climb and when to slide.'

Quotes About Religion

Jimmy Carr also has some great quotes about religion. Here are some of his best:

  • 'Religion is like a game of chess. You have to make the right moves or you'll end up in checkmate.'
  • 'Religion is like a game of poker. You have to know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.'
  • 'Religion is like a game of Monopoly. You have to know when to buy, when to sell, and when to get out of jail free.'
  • 'Religion is like a game of snakes and ladders. You have to know when to climb and when to slide.'

Quotes About Death

Jimmy Carr also has some great quotes about death. Here are some of his best:

  • 'Death is like a game of chess. You have to make the right moves or you'll end up in checkmate.'
  • 'Death is like a game of poker. You have to know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.'
  • 'Death is like a game of Monopoly. You have to know when to buy, when to sell, and when to get out of jail free.'
  • 'Death is like a game of snakes and ladders. You have to know when to climb and when to slide.'

Jimmy Carr is one of the funniest comedians of all time. His quotes are often dark, often controversial, and often politically incorrect. But they are always hilarious. We hope you enjoyed this collection of some of his best quotes and one-liners. Now go out and make someone laugh!